The "Ambition Dial"- Why we're choosing selective ambition

In case you missed it, 2016 is trending on social media. Did I need the reminder of my go-to outfit combo of shoelace choker + ripped skinny jeans + “Rose All Day” tank top? Actually, yeah, it’s been fun to reflect on who we were a decade ago and who we are now! 

2016 is often cited as the last year of the Millennial Optimism Era, and sometimes I really do yearn for the hopeful, active life I lived back then. To set the scene, I graduated from NYU in 2014 and worked my “big girl” entry-level media job in midtown Manhattan through 2016, before leaving for grad school.

*Read the following Day in the Life like Lady Gaga saying “bus 👏 club 👏 ‘nother club 👏 no sleep!”:

Barry’s Bootcamp on Classpass → shower + get ready in the locker room → spend 8 hours in business casual from Ann Taylor LOFT in the office → walk 20 blocks to happy hour → swing by sweetgreen for a Harvest Bowl → take the train home listening to Pandora… with ads(!). 

Ah, the good ol’ days.

But there’s one thing I definitely do not miss about that era, and that’s my very rigid understanding of ambition + drive.

Back then, I believed ambition was something you either had, or you didn’t.

We were driven, or you weren’t.

You either wanted a Big Life at full speed, or you wanted a small life.

That all-or-nothing view was extremely uncharitable, but influenced by the hot media for 20-somethings at the time: Leave Your Mark, The Big Life, Girls, Lauren Conrad being chastised for choosing love over work, etc. The message was loud and clear: slowing down meant opting out.

Now, my friends and I think about ambition very differently.

Think of ambition not as something you either have or you don’t, but as a VOLUME DIAL, one that you get to adjust, based on your priorities in this chapter of your life. 

Your ambition is not all or nothing. It can exist on a spectrum or move in seasons. 

Three years ago, I’d been scaling my own business as a career coach, day in and day out, all on my own, and I was so lonely and burnt out. The ambitious overachiever in me was trying to pretend that everything was fine, but the human in me was exhausted. And, if I’m honest, a little ashamed that it seemed like I couldn’t “hack it” as an entrepreneur.

So I made a decision that felt radical at the time: I adjusted my Ambition Dial down just a notch. I chose to step back into a 9-5 job and give my nervous system a chance to regulate.

Now that it has, I’m in a season where I can push the Ambition Dial up a little bit more, and have more energy to play the long-game.

And now that it has, I’m in a season where I can turn the dial up again—this time with more intention, more energy, and a clearer sense of the long game I actually want to play.

Which brings me to you.

You’re finally recovering from the toxic Girl Boss era, but you’re still ambitious. You  know you still have a lot of potential left to fulfill. So how do you go after that potential and make your younger self proud… without going so hard that you eventually burn out and break down?

A simple way to use the Ambition Dial today

If you want to make this idea real (not just conceptually nice), try this:

⭐ Name the chapter you’re in right now.

Not the one you wish you were in. Not the one you think you “should” be in. The one you’re actually living.

⭐ Then ask yourself three questions:

1. Where is my Ambition Dial currently set?

2. Be honest. Is it on high out of genuine excitement—or habit, pressure, or fear of falling behind?

3. What would happen if I turned it up or down by just one notch?

⭐ What’s one small behavior that would reflect that setting this week?

• Saying no to one extra commitment

• Blocking an hour for deep work instead of busywork

• Reaching out to one person who represents the future you’re building

• Letting yourself rest without labeling it “falling off”

Your ambition doesn’t disappear when you slow down, it just recalibrates. So when you’re ready to turn the dial back up, you’re doing it from a grounded, regulated place… not survival mode.

On a scale of 1 (all the way down) to 10 (all the way up), where is your Ambition Dial set right now?

While I regret my rigid view of ambition from back in the day, these are 3 things I did in 2016 that I'm most thankful for in 2026:

1.  Lived at home for 2 years after college. At the time, it felt like I was sacrificing my social life at a pivotal point post-grad, but that couldn't have been further from the truth. I paid my parents some rent + saved the rest for grad school, and I still managed to make the most of being a 20-something in NYC. Shoutout NJ TRANSIT-- when it chose to run properly!

2. Finally got into fitness (thank you, ClassPass $99 Unlimited plan!). I'd never been a gym class hero or team sports girl, but the boutique fitness craze lowered the barrier to entry and let me experiment with different workouts until I found the ones I loved. My love affair with weight lifting + kettlebells is still going strong. (RIP my OG Outdoor Voices leggings.)

3. Started my career at a legacy corporate company NBCUniversal. There are pros and cons to getting your start in corporate vs. a start up, and choosing to learn the "rules" before I learned to break them was the right call for me.

What about you? Did you make similar choices back then, or did we live completely different lives?!

Love the newsletter but want more? Did you know I put together an entire course called Pivot with Purpose? Think of it like a supercharged version of all the best content from this newsletter, tailored to help you nail your career goals.